31 January 2005

Thanks to Crack Monkey's Comment Below...

...I am reminded that the running joke between Shithead & I is, in fact, a nickname of sorts.

It's Babyboy.

Now before you hurl violently, please realise this nickname is bantered about with all the seriousness of teaking Robin Williams sitting on a whoopee cushion. At a circus surrounded by Jim Carrey clones in their Ace Ventura persona. In space. With robots. And the Pope holding a pink vibrator.

I digress.

See, Curly has this wee fixation with all things Beyonce Knowles. And by wee, I mean borderline bunny boiler level obsession, except without the psychosis and bad 80's perms.

Since the Destiny's Child latest video Lose My Breath was released, Curly takes channel flipping to an all new level in search of just 5 seconds of Beyonce. Not only does it have Classy!Beyonce and Ghetto!Beyonce in a dance throw down, it has Glam!Beyonce for an extra overdose of bootyliciousness. And he really likes that double hair flip she does towards the end.

If channel flipping in search of a video clip was an Olympic sport, Curly would take the gold every single time. He has an uncanny knack for hitting the video 2, 3, even four times in a row.

And so the running joke in the flat is about this uncanny talent, aka The Beyonce Booty Radar. Shithead has seen this prodigious talent exhibited many times now.

Of course this always sparked a discussion of So what the hell are they singing anyway? Beyonce & co. have the booty shakin' down cold; enunciation could use a little work. Even we native-English speakers were hard put to discern specific lyrics.

To be honest, the most we got was Baby, lose my breath.

And so this discussion continued every time Curly flipped to Beyonce. Every. Time.

Until one day he managed to flip to the Italian video station that has English subtitles.

Can you keep up?
Babyboy, make me lose my breath
bring the noise, make me lose my breath
hit me hard, make me lose my hhhh hhhh
Can you keep up?
Babyboy, make me lose my breath
bring the noise, make me lose my breath
hit me hard, make me lose my breath

And lo, we watched entranced as the Mystery of Beyonce's Lyrics was solved before our very eyes.

And lo, the nickname Babyboy was born.

And, dearest sis, if I ever use this nickname with anything less than total sarcasm or if I ever begin calling Shithead by some syrupy sweet, completely nausea-inducing pet name like 'Cutie-Pie' or 'Sweetums' not only will I welcome you flying across the Atlantic to soundly slap me, I will buy your fucking ticket to get here

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