He did it.

I was introduced as the girlfriend last night.

Not 'friend.'
Not 'work colleague.'
Not 'Ex-girlfriend I'd originally dumped despite the fact that she's the best I've ever had in bed who has kindly given me said bed privileges back, mainly because I'm a stubborn persistent bastard.'

Girlfriend.

I am rather proud of myself.

• I didn't faint.
• My jaw did not flop to the ground like a Novocaine junkie.
• I didn't pull a Shaynaynay-esque double take and scream "You did not just go there."
• I didn't blurt out some horrendous, socially inappropriate correction like "Actually we just fuck like rabid weasels in heat."
• I didn't even bat an eyelash

I did, however, blush.

Figures.