20 June 2005

Sesso e La Città Eterna: Mid-Coital Muttering Deja Vu

I fondly remember my full on freak out over the SO's mid-coital Declaration of Luuuuv. I had naturally asked Curly for the male point of view regarding Mid-Coital Mutterings.

"So just how serious are Mid-Coital Mutterings in general? Are we talking 99.9% Grade-A Prime Bullshit resulting from a severe lack of blood loss to the brain? Is it the little head talking for the big head, spouting off what it hopes is verbal lube? Or am I in for some major trouble with Shithead wanting to get serious?"

"Well, the lack of blood to the brain does tend to make one rather uninhibited..."

"Which means?"

"You are so fucked."

Ah. Memories. So pleasant & humorous in retrospect.

If I thought I was fucked before, Saturday's Mid-Coital Mutterings indicate I am about to be fucked DVDA* stylee:

Volgio sposarti

Go on. Stick that little phrase into Babblefish. I'll wait for you to come back.


I'm fucked, right?

Once again I turned to Curly for advice, this time via SMS.

"remember the freak out I had over SO declaring his love for me mid-shag? This time he said he wants to marry me. I'm fucked aren't I?"

"Shall I book your ticket to ________** now? When are you gonna learn to shove a sock in his mouth before doing the horizontal mambo? Did you say 'I doh' ?"***

"Oh shit. I was too busy having an orgasm to say 'I doh'. The sock idea is good - might use that out of bed too. Oh shit oh shit oh shit."

Like that wasn't enough, it seems like everyone has marriage on the brain. We were at Marco Bevecomeunaspugna's place enjoying the new barbeque grill yesterday with his partner & their adorable little girl when the subject of marriage came up - more specifically "When are you going to get married, SO?" Thank Dog dusk managed to cover my flushing red cheeks.

To top it all off, I called my dad for Father's day yesterday.

"Hey Dad. Happy Father's Day"
"Long Lost Daughter! How are you?"
"Eh, good."
"Anything new in Rome?"
"Not really. Same shit, different day."
"Gotcha. Just the normal Colosseum, Pope, ancient ruins.."
"Heh. Basically. Though the Pope is new."
"True. So are you engaged?"
"Well, just thought I'd throw stuff out there & see what stuck."

Jesus F. Christ, y'all. It's a goddamned conspiracy.

* If you don't know what that stands for, be forewarned that a Google search is going to give you some seriously explicit porn
** For another entry, but the SO has been making noises about moving to a different country
*** 'I doh' is an inside joke between Curly & I from waaaay back when. SO had seen a message from Curly, who predictably had made some smartarsed comment about SO, me, & saying 'I do'. SO didn't understand the reference, and, as I hemmed & hawed trying to avoid explaining the English version of wedding vows, asked Curly what 'I doh' meant.

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